From the moment it became clear that the bandits would be playing thota owenshooter asked me to pen the odd missive in the style of (and I quote)
An arrogant, self-obsessed lunatic with a fluent grasp of the english language
Now I questioned whether it would absolutely neccessary to make thota cry like little girls lost in a dark scary forest, but owen assured me that it was. He made clear that it was absolutely required to make thota not just angry...but to make them weep. Now owenshooter is my glorious leader and so I put fingers to keyboard and typed.
But as I have come to realise the enormity of the consequences of my actions (that thota are obviously too scared to enter this forum and are plainly falling to pieces under the pressure) I have become sure that what I did was wrong.
Very, very wrong.
And why? Because this is not a fair fight. Thota's members lack the maturity or wit to combat us bandits at our malicious best and that we have been talking part in the forum equivalent of whipping a blind dog with two legs just for the sheer fun of it.
So from now I can tell thota members still brave enough to actually come here and read (no doubt squinting with one eye and holding on to their knackers for comfort) that from this moment on things will be different. I have taken a stand in the BpB forum and I have said
"No more! These are children we are dealing with here and I will have no truck with fucking with children!"
From now on I want thota members to see this thread as a specially defined, ultra-for-certain, I'm not fucking with you at all...
safe place. The next bandit to horribly rip shreds out of one of you kiddies is going to get a spanking like your mummies give you when you are very naughty indeed.
Adults may look away now, but I feel it is absolutely neccessary to write in language most suitable for children.Now don't you worry. Things are going to be better around here from now on. I know you've cried a lot (and yes it is true that real boys and girls don't cry) but I want you to forget all about that now and remember that while the bandits have made you look very silly indeed, those naughty bandits are going to suffer for it in the long run. Because children, as we all know, santa claus doesn't give presents to naughty children.
Having reached-out to thota in a language they can understand I feel my guilt has been somewhat absolved. But be warned bandits! The next even slightly abusive comment aimed at these kids is going to feel the full wrath of Mr C.