Help me verbally annihilate a work colleague

[Dancing Mustard]

What's up ladies, my name's Slim Shady, I'm the lead singer in D12 baby.

So this lunchtime I have a work colleague who wants to publicly debate 911 with me. He's a big tinfoil hatter and believes that it was all evil government people who did it, obviously I don't.

Previous encounters have seen me mop the floor with the guy, but this time I feel like trouncing him with a more savage abandon... so I need your help to make sure I'm not missing anything.

What are the top 5 "No but seriously, 911 wasn't a Bond Film" arguments that I can hit him with (be they logical reasoning or hardcore expert reports) before he can even get his "But the world is a complex place!" whinging going.

List them here, and I'll report back when the verbal kerb-stomp is complete.

[jiminski]

It's always the Butler!

[Kid_A]

It would be pointless to argue with a crazy. You would sound like a crazy as well.

[Juan_Bottom]

Read "Debunking 9-11 debunking."

You'll know everything then...

[sam_levi_11]

UR INSANEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[Frigidus]

Point out that he disregards the human factor in the cover up, namely the countless thousands of people that would have been in on it that have apparently universally remained silent. The odds of every single one keeping it a secret are beyond slim, they approach nonexistence.

[pimpdave]

Point out that he disregards the human factor in the cover up, namely the countless thousands of people that would have been in on it that have apparently universally remained silent. The odds of every single one keeping it a secret are beyond slim, they approach nonexistence.

As evidence, remind him of Abu Ghraib and every other attempted cover up in American history EVER.

[vtmarik]

Co-worker: "9/11 was a controlled demolition!"
You: "Really, so the hundreds of workers who survived the incident conveniently forgot the dozen or so crew members working for a few weeks drilling holes in support beams and columns, placing in explosives, wiring them in sequence (draping the wires over their keyboards and monitors no doubt), setting the whole thing to a timer so it could be set off without anyone seeing it timed exclusively to a government timetable of when the "plane" would collide and then was brought down in enough time for the government to cook up a reasonable reason for the way things worked out."
C: "Well, it fell straight down, that proves it"
Y: "Oh yes, because gravity works sideways as we all know. Then by that logic If my legs were to suddenly disappear beneath me, i would slide to the left or right at an angle before hitting the ground"
C: "Well what about-"
Y: "And the fact that explosions of that magnitude to bring down buildings of that size would have created a pressure wave that would have set off every car alarm in the vicinity. And the fact that if the government managed to keep this whole thing a secret then why weren't they able to kill the creators of videos like Loose Change before they even hit the Internet. After all, with things like ESCHELON and COINTELPRO they would have been listening in on everything he ever said or did and would have been able to kill him and make it look natural without any difficulty."

Y: "You are right, your case does make more sense than the laws of human nature, physics, and cover-ups. I'm sorry I ever doubted you."

Y: "You sir are dumb, idiotic, impotent, and should consider yourself fortunate that i didn't just punch you in the throat and throw you out of a window. Look greatful that I even took the time to belittle your arguments instead of just ignoring you."

[Matroshka]

Just say "I know you are but what am I?" after everything he says. Win

[strike wolf]

I would just advoid him and if he tries to argue with you just say "look I crush you in this argument everyday. Why the hell do you still want to argue?"

[Neoteny]

Not a verbal annihilation, but I know from experience that whipping your cock out and dickslapping someone is a pretty damn good way of asserting authority. Cocksmack the individual, and then calmly reason with him by showing him the flaws in his logic. He should respond well to the alpha male.

[THORNHEART]

its not worth arguing about even after you crush him again he will be nack for more just ignore him like the pathetic whining human he is

[Frigidus]

its not worth arguing about even after you crush him again he will be nack for more just ignore him like the pathetic whining human he is

Damn humans, their pathetic "debates" bother us.

[luns101]

The 2nd Death Star was not destroyed by the rebellion as many would have us believe

[Skittles!]

The 2nd Death Star was not destroyed by the rebellion as many would have us believe

You mean.. The Emperor did it himself? NOOOO!

[Juan_Bottom]

Wait, saying that thousands were involved wont work, and is an aweful suggestion.

A real-world example is aliens. How many military, and government workers have come forward to say that aliens are real? Yet you don't believe them, what's the difference?

[Frigidus]

Wait, saying that thousands were involved wont work, and is an aweful suggestion.

A real-world example is aliens. How many military, and government workers have come forward to say that aliens are real? Yet you don't believe them, what's the difference?

Well, there have been none for 9/11. As for UFOs, while I am rather certain that aliens exist somewhere, I highly doubt that they'd just fly around in the boonies, occasionally revealing themselves to suspect people with shitty cameras. I look at things using what I guess I'd call "social logic". Are the motives and actions realistic ones? Is a cover up of such a high magnitude possible? Is the story put forth by any "insiders" believable?

[Juan_Bottom]

Wait, saying that thousands were involved wont work, and is an aweful suggestion.

A real-world example is aliens. How many military, and government workers have come forward to say that aliens are real? Yet you don't believe them, what's the difference?

Well, there have been none for 9/11. As for UFOs, while I am rather certain that aliens exist somewhere, I highly doubt that they'd just fly around in the boonies, occasionally revealing themselves to suspect people with shitty cameras. I look at things using what I guess I'd call "social logic". Are the motives and actions realistic ones? Is a cover up of such a high magnitude possible? Is the story put forth by any "insiders" believable?

I was only trying to make a point. I'm not talking about people saying that they were abducted, just people who have worked for the government, and did have top secret access saying that aliens are real.

They people who have come forward on 9-11 have been outsiders. Contract workers cleaning up the debri, for instance. I still say that if it was a cover up, a hundred people could pull it off. I don't honestly see why thousands would need to be involved.

I'm just saying, saying that people would have come forward is a double standard, because people have come forward on other conspiracies, and they are ignored.


But if you could gloss through a copy of "Debunking 9-11 debunking" you'll know all his arguements, and his arguements AGAINST your rebuttles. You'd have the other teams playbook.

[black elk speaks]

I was only trying to make a point. I'm not talking about people saying that they were abducted, just people who have worked for the government, and did have top secret access saying that aliens are real.

They people who have come forward on 9-11 have been outsiders. Contract workers cleaning up the debri, for instance. I still say that if it was a cover up, a hundred people could pull it off. I don't honestly see why thousands would need to be involved.

I'm just saying, saying that people would have come forward is a double standard, because people have come forward on other conspiracies, and they are ignored.


But if you could gloss through a copy of "Debunking 9-11 debunking" you'll know all his arguements, and his arguements AGAINST your rebuttles. You'd have the other teams playbook.

how about you post some credible sources for your statements there juan? more than one thistime, perhaps?

[Juan_Bottom]

For one all those links I posted where NASA Astronauts like Mitchell and Aldrin said that they were warned about aliens before going up to the moon. Mitchell even said Rosewell was a real alien crash.


Also, I would like to point out, that I do not believe in aliens. And this thread isn't about that either.

[jay_a2j]

Point out that he disregards the human factor in the cover up, namely the countless thousands of people that would have been in on it that have apparently universally remained silent. The odds of every single one keeping it a secret are beyond slim, they approach nonexistence.

There could be a few explanations for this.


1) They could all be dead. (killed after the job was done)

2) If this mind control thing that I have heard about has any merit. They could have done it, then not remembered doing it.

3) Fear. Fear of themselves being killed and/or their families.

[Juan_Bottom]

Seriously though, for the record, I was trying to help DM.

[Snorri1234]

Tell him to go back and reread.

[GabonX]

One up him and tell him you think aliens blew up the World Trade Center.

[Juan_Bottom]

One up him and tell him you think aliens blew up the World Trade Center.

Brilliant!