by codierose on Mon Apr 04, 2011 12:44 pm
1. You want to be in a CLAN. One night, the Devil makes you a deal that will instantly rocket you to super-stardom, multi GOLD medal success, adoring fans and critical acclaim for the duration of your CLAN career. The downside is that in exchange for this fame, your all-time favorite CLAN will cease to exist. Any memory of their legacy will disappear forever, and you will never be able to play in any of their games ever again.
Do you take the deal?
2. You are offered the sum of one billion dollars to never engage in any type of CLAN team sex again. Breaking of this rule will result in instant death.
Do you take the offer?
3. Through an address mix-up at the CDA, you are mailed an envelope containing the unbelievably true stories behind the moon landing (faked), Kennedy assassination (cover-up), Roswell crash (UFO) and the interpretive ending of 2001: A Space Odyssey (beats me). Once you open this envelope, you will know the truth behind all of these events, but from that point forward, everyone you meet will be convinced that you are insane. No matter what facts you present, arguments you make or books you write, you will be branded a loon and be permanently ostracized from the life that you once knew. You will never be believed by anyone.
Do you open the envelope?
4.Through a post-apocalyptic CLAN WAR, you are crowned the champion and rewarded with anything you want for the rest of your life. The only drawback is that every time you blink, you will crap your pants. This is incurable and unavoidable in every way.
Is it worth it?