by AAFitz on Sun Aug 23, 2009 8:03 am
actually, technically speaking...
only the description of your appearance is a flame, and a completely uncalled for one at that.
the question, "are you gay?" however while obviously meant to be mean spirited is really just a question. Its even possible that the person himself is gay, and is simply curious if you are too.
He really is just asking if you are gay. And, unless you attribute something negative to being gay, there technically is nothing wrong with asking if you are. I fully agree, and would say ship him out, but the way he phrased it, it really isnt necessarily a homophobic slur, even though its probable that that is how he meant it.
He very well could just think you are ugly, and should be banned for flaming...but could on the other hand say he was just curious if you were gay, and not be suggesting that you are, or that there is anything wrong with you on that end, whether you are or not.
Im sure it was an accidental loophole, but if you really read it, its not necessarily homophobic.
But again, ship him for the other comments. Its well beyond the flaming, and im sure it wont be long before he slips again.
The problem with saying "are you gay?" is a homophobic statement, is that by itself, it would insinuate that being gay is wrong somehow, or some kind of insult, which, you need to have a homophobic stance in the first place to have.
Now, if he was talking about something other than just your face, and maybe some kind of behavior that could possibly have been attributed to what he would consider "gay" behavior, it would be crystal clear that he meant the question to be a slur. But as stated, he flames you for your appearance, which should get him banned right there.... but then simply asks if you are gay. Again, technically, anyone can ask anyone if they are gay. If we cant, it insinuates that if someone is gay there is something wrong or negative, and allows homophobia to win.
The best response to this is this. "Im sorry you dont like how I look. Nor do I care. Further, flaming is against the rules, and Im reporting you. And, I happen to be heterosexual. Why do you ask? Theoretically, you could probably ask, why, are you gay?" but it would probably be better not to.
You have to be careful what you call a homophobic slur or a racial slur. If you arent careful, you create one defacto by accident.
Anyone can ask me:
Are you asian?
Are you gay?
Are you catholic?
Its perhaps too personal a question and even rude...and probably even meant as a flame, but unless the statement before clearly leads into the said question, the question itself is harmless and really cant be regulated.
I will answer: no Im of irish descent, no, and not really, but I used to be.
Im interested to see other opinions on this, but Im pretty sure Im correct, at least on the correct side of a pretty gray area.
I hate that I kind of defended this guy, because I think the whole statement has no place here, but, I happened to see it from this angle.
I'm Spanking Monkey now....err...I mean I'm a Spanking Monkey now...that shoots milk
Too much. I know.