Conquer Club

1000 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart

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Postby UnderSeage on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:20 pm

Take a shit in the toilet in the hardware section
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Postby Snowpepsi on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:20 pm

67. Use up all the disposable cameras on our party. Put them all into the developing box.
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Postby Snowpepsi on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:22 pm

69. Write a sign above the dental floss that reads," Don't bother buying this, you'll only use it right before your next appointment."
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Postby apey on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:22 pm

test out all of the tooth brushes
04:42:40 ‹apey› uhoh
04:42:40 ‹ronc8649› uhoh
iAmCaffeine: 4/28/2016. I love how the PL players are getting wet on your wall
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Postby Snowpepsi on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:23 pm

70. Post a sign that say's "Tobacco Kills" above the cigarettes.
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Postby Snowpepsi on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:24 pm

72. Raise all the falling prices signs.
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Postby Snowpepsi on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:25 pm

73. Sit down in the book aisle and read a book, cover to cover.
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Postby pmchugh on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:26 pm

74. hide the "wet floor" sign deliberately fall and then sue the store
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Postby Snowpepsi on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:43 pm

75. Play some conquer club on the managers computer.
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Postby apey on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:44 pm

have a party in the garden center I can get the men from down under
04:42:40 ‹apey› uhoh
04:42:40 ‹ronc8649› uhoh
iAmCaffeine: 4/28/2016. I love how the PL players are getting wet on your wall
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Postby Snowpepsi on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:45 pm

77. Bring Pepsi to this party.
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Postby apey on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:46 pm

pepsi is the life of the party
04:42:40 ‹apey› uhoh
04:42:40 ‹ronc8649› uhoh
iAmCaffeine: 4/28/2016. I love how the PL players are getting wet on your wall
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Postby Snowpepsi on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:49 pm

78. Fly
Last edited by Snowpepsi on Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:28 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby apey on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:55 pm

at their expense :lol:
04:42:40 ‹apey› uhoh
04:42:40 ‹ronc8649› uhoh
iAmCaffeine: 4/28/2016. I love how the PL players are getting wet on your wall
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Postby Snowpepsi on Sat Mar 01, 2008 10:58 pm

apey wrote:at their expense :lol:



Yeah what she said.
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Postby muy_thaiguy on Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:14 pm

79. Play condom tag until there aren't any more boxes.
"Eh, whatever."
-Anonymous


What, you expected something deep or flashy?
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Postby misterman10 on Sat Mar 01, 2008 11:16 pm

1. Take shopping carts for the express purpose of filling them and stranding them at strategic locations.
2. Ride those little electronic cars at the front of the store.
3. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at ten minute intervals throughout the day.
4. Start playing Calvinball; see how many people you can get to join in.
5. Contaminate the entire auto department by sampling all the spray air fresheners.
6. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
7. Leave cryptic messages on the typewriters.
8. Re-dress the mannequins as you see fit.
9. When there are people behind you, walk really slow, especially thin narrow aisles.
10. Walk up to an employee and tell him in an official tone, “I think we’ve got a Code 3 in Housewares,” and see what happens.
11. Tune all the radios to a polka station; then turn them all off and turn the volumes to “10”.
12. Play with the automatic doors.
13. Walk up to complete strangers and say, “Hi! I haven’t seen you in so long!...” etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment.
14. While walking through the clothing department, ask yourself loud enough for all to hear, “Who buys this crap, anyway?”
15. Repeat Number 14 in the jewelry department.
16. Ride a display bicycle through the store; claim you’re taking it for a “test drive.”
17. Follow people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this until they leave the department.
18. Play soccer with a group of friends, using the entire store as your playing field.
19. As the cashier runs your purchases over the scanner, look mesmerized and say, “Wow. Magic!”
20. Put M&M’s on layaway.
21. Move “Caution: Wet Floor” signs to carpeted areas.
22. Set up a tent in the camping department; tell others you’ll only invite them in if they bring pillows from Bed and Bath.
23. Test the fishing rods and see what you can “catch” from the other aisles.
24. Ask other customers if they have any Grey Poupon.
25. Drape a blanket around your shoulders and run around saying, “...I’m Batman. Come, Robin—to the Batcave!”
26. TP as much of the store as possible.
27. Randomly throw things over into neighboring aisles.
28. Play with the calculators so that they all spell “hello” upside down.
29. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, “Why won’t you people just leave me alone?”
30. When two or three people are walking ahead of you, run between them, yelling, “Red Rover!”
31. Make up nonsense products and ask newly hired employees if there are any in stock, i.e., “Do you have any Shnerples here?”
32. Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men.
33. Take bets on the battle described above.
34. Nonchalantly “test” the brushes and combs in Cosmetics.
35. While handling guns in the hunting department, suddenly ask the clerk if he knows where the anti-depressants are. Act as spastic as possible.
36. Hold indoor shopping cart races.
37. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from Mission: Impossible.
38. Attempt to fit into very large gym bags.
39. Attempt to fit others into very large gym bags.
40. Say things like, “Would you be so kind as to direct me to your Twinkies?”
41. Set up a “Valet Parking” sign in front of the store.
42. Two words: “Marco Polo.”
43. Leave Cheerios in Lawn and Garden, pillows in the pet food aisle, etc.
44. “Re-alphabetize” the CD’s in Electronics.
45. In the auto department, practice your “Madonna” look with various funnels.
46. When someone steps away from their cart to look at something, quickly make off with it without saying a word.
47. Relax in the patio furniture until you get kicked out.
48. When an announcement comes over the loudspeaker, assume the fetal position and scream, “No, no! It’s those voices again!”
49. Pay off layaways fifty cents at a time.
50. Drag a lounge chair on display over to the magazines and relax. If the store has a food court, buy a soft drink; explain that you don’t get out much, and ask if they can put a little umbrella in it.
Pleasant Chaps still suck cock.

Yakuza power.
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Postby pmchugh on Sun Mar 02, 2008 6:41 am

130. Allow misterman out of the mental home next door.
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Postby suggs on Sun Mar 02, 2008 7:17 am

Are digging tunnels still banned? If so, dig a tunnel out of the store.
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Postby bryguy on Sun Mar 02, 2008 8:21 am

132. Place a Dora doll in the middle of an isle, and whenever someone tries to pick it up yell "SWIPER NO SWIPING!!!"
133. Stand in a rack of shirts and whenever someone passes by yell "Pick me! Pick me!"
134. Go into the changing stalls (or whatever there called) and after awhile yell "THERES NO TOILET PAPER IN HERE!!!"
135. Stand in the doorway and ask someone to kick you out :)
136. Glue a coin to the floor with super glue and see how many ppl lose finger nails trying to lift it up
137. Get an order from one of Wal-Marts food areas (Mc Donalds, Subway, etc) and at the end of your order, say with a serious face, "and I would like a diet water with that"
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Postby Thorum on Sun Mar 02, 2008 11:09 am

138. Speak Arabian
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Postby PyroKid55 on Sun Mar 02, 2008 11:15 am

139. go to the gun department and ask where the anti-depressants are
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Postby pmchugh on Sun Mar 02, 2008 1:46 pm

140. buy lots of bubblegum make it into a huge ball and stick the tills to the ceiling.
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Postby Snowpepsi on Sun Mar 02, 2008 1:50 pm

PyroKid55 wrote:139. go to the gun department and ask where the anti-depressants are

Very good.




141. Drop through the ceiling on a rope llike Indiana Jones. Make sure to mutter,"Snakes...I hate snakes."
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Postby pmchugh on Sun Mar 02, 2008 2:05 pm

142. play ten pin bowling with a melon and wine bottles.
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