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The Desolation

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The Desolation

Postby nicolas.floyd on Fri Dec 03, 2010 3:38 am

Hey Guys, I have been sitting on this idea of maps for almost a year now and have finally found a little time to draw the first up and work on it a little. There will be four more drawn up for separate regions on the Island that this map is based from, then the sixth map will be the Island as a whole that contains all these maps rolled into one. It’s a little confusing, but I have the first one below. I just wanted to see what you guys thought about it, Thanks. -Nico

Click image to enlarge.
image
Last edited by nicolas.floyd on Sun Dec 05, 2010 12:37 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Re: The Desolation

Postby natty dread on Fri Dec 03, 2010 4:33 am

Nice artwork. Great first draft.

However, there's stuff you should look into: firstly, eliminate all 4-way borders. They're confusing for players. Then you have some borders that aren't exactly clear. In mapmaking, functionality must always come first. For example, does Sickle border Lude, Vin <-> Kodal, Fyn <-> Krim? You can't have visual ambiguity when it comes to borders. Otherwise the graphics are nice, although a bit too dark.

Then the gameplay: you have a nice backstory for your map, which is laudable - a map should have a theme and a story. But the gameplay doesn't reflect the story too well. Figure out which elements of the story are fundamental to it and then find a way to integrate those elements into the gameplay of the map.
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Re: The Desolation

Postby Arama86n on Fri Dec 03, 2010 5:05 am

Overall, for a first Draft: =D> very nice.

One thought; the 2-bonus at the top left corner. I see three land boarders and a sea-route. Four boarders is in my opinion too much for a 2-bonus. In comparison the top right bonus is a 4-bonus(!) with only three (or possibly four, the map is unclear) boarders! Just something to think about.

Best of luck with this.
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Re: The Desolation

Postby Industrial Helix on Fri Dec 03, 2010 9:10 am

You get 5 gold stars for graphics and design. Very awesome first draft.

The story is kind of weak, but the graphics are pleasing so I won't complain. Plus, if I feel the need to eliminate the mysterious island notion, i think it looks like a map of lower scotland in its outline.

The four way borders... There's one in Gilish but everything else seems ok.

Submit a design brief when you get the chance.
Sketchblog [Update 07/25/11]: http://indyhelixsketch.blogspot.com/
Living in Japan [Update 07/17/11]: http://mirrorcountryih.blogspot.com/
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Re: The Desolation

Postby BenKenobie on Fri Dec 03, 2010 12:00 pm

Not that I know anything...But it looks great so far!! Keep up the good work and let me know if I can do anything to help!
:mrgreen:
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Re: The Desolation

Postby ironsij0287 on Fri Dec 03, 2010 12:09 pm

Any chance we can see a rough outline of the entire island and how this first section fits into it?
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Re: The Desolation

Postby nicolas.floyd on Fri Dec 03, 2010 2:44 pm

Thanks guys for the feedback, I have new ideas and will have a new version up as soon as I can. The back story for all the Islands will be changed into an individual story for each map, and the overall story will be used for the map of the whole Island. I had a few questions though, I am a little confused on what a design briefing is and the four-way borders, is that for a region or a bonus territory? Anyway, here is the rough design of the whole map that I drew up a year ago for the whole island, sorry, its a little rough, at the far left beside the lake is the current map I'm working on:

Image

Thanks again guys for the feedback, its been really helpful so far!
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Re: The Desolation

Postby Victor Sullivan on Fri Dec 03, 2010 3:50 pm

Very nice! A few things:

1. Very nice graphics, but as natty said, you gotta make the borders more clear.
2. I feel the gameplay doesn't reflect the story very well. The story mentions several countries fighting over gold, and I see neither gold nor other countries. Suggestion - turn the cities into gold mines and make 8 starting positions for eight counties fighting over the mines.
3. It'd be cool if the Tar Pit could be a territory - maybe a killer neutral or something, just to add a little extra feature.
4. Once the borders are more clear I'll look into the bonuses you've assigned.

Good start! Keep up the good work!

-Sully
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Re: The Desolation

Postby natty dread on Sat Dec 04, 2010 3:42 am

Some things about the story... fighting for "gold" in a post-apocalyptic world seems weird somehow. These people are (I assume) struggling for their very survival, what the heck will they do with gold? I'd think stuff like food, oil, ect. would be more valuable in that situation.

The story also says the resources of all the countries are depleted after the "great nuclear war" (not even getting to how a nuclear war has left any survivors at all...) so how do they still have the resources to fight over an island? One would think, after a nuclear war, clean farmland would be more valuable than any minerals. You know, you can't even fight wars if you can't feed your soldiers...

As for the 4-way borders, it means a corner between 4 territories, where it is ambiguous which territories can assault which (do the ones diagonal to each other connect or not?) therefore it is best to avoid these types of borders alltogether.
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Re: The Desolation

Postby Industrial Helix on Sat Dec 04, 2010 11:13 am

I don't think that the borders are unclear to be honest... yeah, they don't touch, but I think its pretty easy to understand what they're saying.

Natty has a point about the story and I'd like to offer some ideas. Remove the date and the specifics of how our civilization was destroyed and tell it less from a historical third person view and more from the point of view of the next civilization. Think of Homer and how he refers to this past great civilization in the Iliad or Odyssey, but no one really knows what happened to it. You don't have to mention a struggle for specific resources either (plus gold or oil wouldn't be on a recently formed volcanic island). If I were writing it

I'd say something like this: "The great civilizations of Earth are gone, having perished in the great tribulation. That old heroic age of global powers and enduring nations has receded in time, leaving the earth deformed and unrecognizable. The successor nations engage in ceaseless war with each other for resources, power and prestige. One such location has seen unending trials at the hands of the great states, it is called the Desolation."

And then boom, there you have your background story with sufficient openness to make future maps and not get caught up in continuity. Plus, you don't write yourself into conundrums with problems like "if they're out of resources then how'd they get there?" All a player really needs to know is that its still earth, but a changed earth from some calamity (nukes, meteors, volcanos, ect) and that the Desolation is the world's biggest hotspot. Plus, it generates interest in your series should you ever decide to expand your map.
Sketchblog [Update 07/25/11]: http://indyhelixsketch.blogspot.com/
Living in Japan [Update 07/17/11]: http://mirrorcountryih.blogspot.com/
Russian Revolution map for ConquerClub [07/20/11]: viewtopic.php?f=241&t=116575
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Re: The Desolation

Postby nicolas.floyd on Sat Dec 04, 2010 1:53 pm

Design Brief:
• The names of up to 2 cartographers who will be developing the map: I (Nicolas.floyd) will be handling the design, artwork, feedback and overall direction that the map will take, superkeener has agreed to handle the XML for the map once all the kinks in the design, direction and art are worked out.
• Map Size: I have obviously chose the 840x800 pixel map for the large version, it gives me more room for aesthetics. The map has 30 territories and 6 regions. (I like sully’s idea on making the tarpit a neutral territory, maybe one that resets after 1 turn and adds no collective bonus)
• Your aims/design style: I am going to rewrite the overall story and save it for the bigger map of the whole island. An individual story will be written for each individual map (such as this one) with goals and objectives. i.e. this map will have a story more specific to the design with restrictions and abilities placed on regions and capitals (i.e. highland capital can bombard the eastern battlelands and lowland capital can bombard western battlelands).
• Uniqueness: I feel that this map isn’t too different from classic cc maps, I have always enjoyed playing maps such as classic, Europe 1914 and Luxemburg and I didn’t want to make things too complicated for the players. I don’t mind to throw things like city bombardment, port attacks and auto deploy in there but I also don’t want to have complicated themes or hard to read designs. I pretty much wanted to create an enjoyable map for any level of cc player from beginner to advanced.
• Relevant Experience: I have not contributed to any of the maps that have been created, I have reviewed a few posts but as far as the map foundry process goes I’m a newbie. I do know Adobe CS like the back of my hand, I have been a Graphic Artist and freelance Illustrator for over 7 years and a fine artist pretty much my whole life and hold a degree in Graphic Design with a focus in Illustration. I haven’t read any of tutorials on how to design a map or anything of that manner so this whole process is new to me.

Natty and Industrial – thanks for the ideas on the story and structure, I especially like the Homer style of writing and form. That’s a great take on the story, I especially like how it keeps the player in the dark about the past and leaves more to the imagination.

Design Changes
• I’m going to change the tar pit into a quicksand area. I consulted a geologist and tar is built up over years, seeing as though this island has pretty much popped out of nowhere it would be impossible geologically for there to be a tar pit.
• The Lowland and Highland Capitals can bombard the opposing Battle lands.
• Players can receive an extra collective bonus for holding both the Highland and Lowland regions
• Sicle and Lude will not be able to attack eachother
• Gilish will contain 5 territories rather than 6
• Wooded areas will be thrown into certain areas of the map to help divide territories.

Thanks again for the great feedback guys, it’s really helped the creative process along. I’m going to begin work on the second version of this map within the next couple of weeks and see what happens. I will post it as soon as possible with the story and design changes. -Nico
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Re: The Desolation

Postby Industrial Helix on Sat Dec 04, 2010 3:20 pm

General protocol requires you to post the design brief in the design brief thread, so when you get a chance put it in there. It's a nice way for us mods to keep track of what's going on in terms of ideas and movement.

So, let's sticky this map and soon it will beon its way to the gameplay workshop where you'll work out the details of the gameplay.
Sketchblog [Update 07/25/11]: http://indyhelixsketch.blogspot.com/
Living in Japan [Update 07/17/11]: http://mirrorcountryih.blogspot.com/
Russian Revolution map for ConquerClub [07/20/11]: viewtopic.php?f=241&t=116575
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Re: The Desolation

Postby nicolas.floyd on Tue Dec 14, 2010 1:44 pm

I posted the Design Brief, sorry I have had a busy couple of weeks and haven't had a chance to do any work on the map yet. Is there anything else that I need to do besides the design brief at this point?
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Re: The Desolation

Postby Industrial Helix on Tue Dec 14, 2010 8:35 pm

Bascially, I just want the Brief and an update reflecting some of the criticism made already in this thread. The only thing definitely holding you up is the four corner border... everything else should be up to your discretion.
Sketchblog [Update 07/25/11]: http://indyhelixsketch.blogspot.com/
Living in Japan [Update 07/17/11]: http://mirrorcountryih.blogspot.com/
Russian Revolution map for ConquerClub [07/20/11]: viewtopic.php?f=241&t=116575
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